you're welcome baby .
(:

love you too .
no more emomo .
i'll make you smile again today .
promise .

come home soon !

- from your loving husband hahahahahahaha .

in life, theres always bleak moments.
where u feel like nothing is possible.
nothing could be done to make you feel better.

im trying my best.
to overcome that feeling.

its like,

some things make u feel so happy,
and suddenly everything just plummeted down.
into this pit.
where i find difficulty in climbing out.

im not emomo.

i will be better.

and funny enough.
when u thought no one cares for you.
suddenly, when u feel down like this,
everyone comes to your aid.
what does this mean?

silent supporters?


nevermind.

i'll be better.
im sure.

or at least,
i hope.

its becoming excruciating for me to stay home,
while knowing that someone's gonna come home really soon.

i dont feel like talking to people at home.
i feel like,
im wasting my time.
and they're testing my patience.
really.

its one of the rare afternoons im home alone.
but the rain ,
and the fact that someone's gonna come home soon
made the afternoon not so bearable.
=\

why is it that it seemed like everything's my fault?
when someone nags at me,
all i can is to keep quiet.
i can only swallow my tears.

im getting irritated.

i drank two cups of coffee today.
i think im hitting three today.

i eat alot when i get upset.
-.-

' you seemed to be easily affected by things happening around you'.

yes,
very true.
=\

im pouring out everything here.
i deserve to.

CITY HARVEST CHURCH PERF. 26.9.08.

three ways to solve a problem . (applicable to joey ONLY)

1 . talk to james about it .
2 . talk to james about it .
3 . talk to james about it .

if the above does not work , repeat steps 1 - 3 .
i'll help you open up . you'll see .
(:

seems like everything is my fault.
my fault for smsing you,
my fault for not meeting up on sunday.

the contradicting thing .

when he has exams,
all of you asked me to go to her place.

when i have exams?
you guys didnt even asked him to go to her place.

so whats wrong with all of you?

this just ruined my mood for today again .

-

i hate my life now.

i have alot to spill, but i dont know where to start.
sometimes,
i feel fate is playing too cruel a trick on me .
making me feeling so much over problems im facing now.
=\

i feel my life's screwed.
i wonder what it will be like without dance.
without something i love.
and something i call my own.

im tired, mentally.
tired of saying,
' joey, you can do it. have faith!
joey , just a little bit more!
joey, bear with it . endure!'

too much for me.

your heart's like a jug.
with all your emotions inside.
mine's filled to the brim.
but i let it overflow.
why.
?

everyone at home says hi bye to me.
am i wrong in pursuing what i love?
why are all of you stopping me?
am i that detestable?

assumptions.
i hate it.

people are selfish.
they dont learn how to put themselves into other's shoes.

all i ask for ,
is all of you to understand.
to put yourselves into my shoes.
im not complaining.
and dont complain on my behalf.

when u said i'll be tired,
when u said i'm not feeling well.
you are saying that.
not ME.
dont put words into my mouth.

i've learnt how to avoid things, and leave it lying.
which is bad.
nevermind.
nobody understands.
i'll be better by tomorrow.

emotions overflowing now.
soon, it'll be time to put more in again.

DOPE TO THE MAX .
joey . (:

my source of inspiration .
LOL .
okay this post is so ripped . =p
yayaya i'm jealous okay !
i love you . (:

- james .

what a good start to my morning.
its bad enough when you dont understand.
so stop assuming shit when u know nothing.

i didnt intrude your life.
so dont intrude mine.
and f. stop assuming.

its raining now.

now i know why people are suicidal.
over these kind of buggers probably.
i hope i wont be.


and did i mention
i hate people shouting at me.
especially in the morning.

DOPE TO THE MAX.

kite.(:

my source of inspiration.

lol.

crazy legs! haha.=x

more updates later!

its 340am.
i dont feel tired.
in fact,
i feel happy.

im learning more every day.
and today?

its much more than other days.
(:

training was fun today haha.
(:
trained our 'old man' with this piece of paper stuck in bet . our legs.
LOL.
freaking funny.
i looked like some duck walking can!
hahaa.
and choreo is dope.
heh.
(:

session time was fun too.
but i didnt know the 2nd song.
so i dont know what i can do.
so irritated with myself.
lol.
and i think jeremy is dope.
15 years old. and can freestyle so well.
shld be ashamed.
LOL.

then stayed back.
funny stuff.
finally took out the hush pups that i didnt wear for almost 10 mths already.
and everyone went whoaaaa-.-
lol.
sessioned sesssioneddddddddddd LOL.
-

training tomorrow agn.
dope.
till then.
(:

didnt blog for 3 days already.
and now, i dont know where to start LOL.
every day is jam packed with activities.
ask me what i did on monday, and
trust me. i cant answer .
LOL.=X

dance is good, as usual.
having fun, and absorbing every thing i see and observe in class.
heh .
having fun, doing what i love most.
and gin talked to us about vision.
lol.
we shared, and i thought about it alot.
even when i reached home that night.
(:
being a dancer means alot to me.
its my everything. it taught me alot.
taught me to realise whats gg on in my body and stuff.
loads of stuff that i wont even bother last time.
i learnt to be open minded, to accept things much more easily.
and of course , to work with people.
i never want to stop dancing.
and i will never forget the painful sacrifices. time with family,
time with friends. and once, when i didnt have time to myself.
but its all worth it to me.
i dont have a life.
im to lazy to even go shopping now.
everything is bout dance to me.
good thing?
(:

obstacles are still here.
alot.
my parents are the main ones.
but i realised i chose to avoid.
avoid the fact that they are the ones trying to stop me from dancing.
and what an irony.
my dad brought me into dancing in the first place.
-.-
dont they see the difference in me , in these 5 years?
nevermind.
i think im just feeling sucky.
waking up in the morning,
to find your dad shouting at you for going to dance on a sunday.
all i know,
is that i want to be alone.
thats all.
=\
-

comm based training on monday.
bounces, groove.
come to me come to me~
lol.
and reggaeeeeeee.
chinawine chinawine~ lol
.
-

dance to express, not to impress.
must remember(:

limin says people who dance 7 days a week are dope.
aahaha.
i think we're all dope.
LOL.
and all to best to you kay.
danzation .(:
lol.

i think i had a nightmare last night.
but i cant remember already.
zzz.
-

training at 430pm later.
excited.
bye.
(:

if any of you have problems with the way my girl blogs then please leave .
if you're still unhappy please look for ME .
if you're irritated by this post then please look for ME .
joey had nothing to do with me typing this out so if you wanna spread gossip , spread about ME .

my email is madspins@hotmail.com .
if you have issues with what joey types on her blog .
talk to me .
(:

i am not trying to aggravate matters .
i'm telling you what to do if you feel offended by this blog or whatsoever .
peace . V(^_^)V

- james .

i came to realise that i can be a possessive friend sometimes.
i dont know.
maybe i feel insecure or smth. haha.
i dont like it when someone totally out of the picture comes in,
and gets all close with your close friend.
its like,
okay maybe it isnt wrong, but its weird.

being hard hearted is good at times.
makes people learn , and grow up.
no spoon feeding.
(:
being too nice aint good.
people takes advantage.

im still sticking to my principle.
'i'll be nice, if ure nice too.'
maybe a few more incidents will wake me up,
and change that principle.

im much more sensitive now.
towards everything.
difficult to heck care,
cause everyone's changing.
lol.

i find it difficult to express my feelings.
so i tend to keep inside.
even when im upset with my close friends,
i will just shut up.
thinking that they will realise.
but maybe im wrong at times.

i will blog more tomorrow.
lol.
sudden urge to write all these down.
heh .

and to the post ABOVE.
hahaa.
yeah.
its by james.
but helloooo.
the thing is officially over already.
so no point talking bout it.

respect. (:

im feeling so much better now.
maybe because things are much clearer in my eyes now.
and maybe i feel happier.
with dance,
with friends.
(:

i guess im not gonna say much bout that incident anymore.
but, this is still my blog.
and i hope there is respect present to whoever reading.
applies to other blogs too.
(:
im not angry or pissed.
heh .
-

auditions later.
haha.
first time im doing reggae.
lol.
hope all would be good.
and yes.
groove groove for hiphop item.
(:
-

i went to check my hush pups .
lol.
lucky no white insects hahah.
thanks ben LOL.
will wear them soon.
hahhaa .
-

i sleep alot nowadays.
heh .
and i like being home alone.
lol.
-.-
no link.
-

bei says whenever she reads my blog,
she always see sadness or anger in my entries.
haha .
bei!
look at this post.
=x
no anger, no sadness.
-

thanks chin(:
for the song.
dont worry, im fine.
haha.
-

and to the bartender,

take care of yourself please.
no hitting on girls!
LOLLLLL.
(:






omg dope shit.
i always get excited when i see kite pop.
LOL.
omgggggg KITEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
HAHAHA.

it feels like i've not been blogging for a long time.
-.-
lol.
but i didnt blog for like what.
only close to 2 days.
LOL.
-

recital training had been good so far.
i really really enjoyed the sessions.
heh.
esp for popping today.
i feel like,
im in the zone where everyone around me are the same.
sharing the same love for popping.
i feel , at ease.
yeahs.
(:
there wont be people staring at your dressing,
your HAIR-.-
and the things u do when u hear music.
lol.
-

alot of things happened.
made me so angery, and upset.
zzz.
but nevermind.
shit things happen.
people just dont know how to learn from mistakes.
-.-
and i realised,
when im upset,
i eat alot.
and thanks ah diana.
for the fattening chocs.
lol.
-

feeling frustrated and all.
zzz.
can someone cheer me up abit.
i want a hug.
like how nel gave me one.-.-
-

busy busy busy.
comm based proj,
recital training,
floor the love,
wade robson/code edge.

whoa.
lol.

kay no mood alr.
bye.

it rained today .
slept till noon.
-

sorted out some stuff,
and headed out with diana.
we watched 'death race'.
and i dont mind watching it again.
its nice.
lol.

we had a long talk,
bout SAW 1,2 and 3.
bout alot of stuffs.
and i like the company.
and she told me stuffs that made me clearer now.

i missed the sentosa outing,
but i guess only a few would understand.
nevermind.
-

training in the morning,
reggae class in the afternoon,
choreo routine in the afternn.
and recital training in the evening.
dope.

i love dance.
(:

dont say things when you dont mean it.
say it when you actually do mean it.

i wanna scream.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

screw you.

nevermind.


i dont want to be the person to set things right this time.

joey passed MBS.
in fact its better than the other subject grades.

i had a sucky day.
knowing things i dont wanna know.
spilling my coffee when im reading the newspaper in the morning,
spilling coffee powder all over my hands when i made one more cup.

looking blur in modern class.
cant catch steps as a result.
had my skin peeled off, by friction on floor.
saying its 218pm, where its 218AM. -.-

me feeling very upset now.

just bang the wall, and go eat shit please.

second time.

its funny how this world works.
people love to assume, think bout themselves before others, and wants to do things their own way.
i had my fair share of watching people becoming like that, after i knew them. and its sad to see themselves not being aware that they've changed.

and i know you read my post.

if you think i've judged you based on that incident only, you're seriously wrong.
i thought you knew me. knew how i judge things.
so, you think i judged you through that incident?
fine.
(:

and.
please reflect.
i know you're avoiding me.
and i hope you're aware that so many people are trying to help you out here.
if u keep ranting, without realising what is the root of the problem,
then i guessed u've just wasted all of your friend's advices.
for you.

dont keep harping on the fact that, that thing happened.
have you ever thought of how that person felt too?
the world is not only about you.
a relationship is not only about you.
dont ask back the question,
'did he even think bout me too?'
dont bother asking.
ask yourself.
have u ever thought bout him too?
(:

maybe it isnt a wise decision to blog bout this,
but maybe i should just bring the point across.
no matter how many people you told this to, it wont make a difference.
you can tell to the whole wide world.
but you ask yourself deep inside,
who will actually be the ones helping you?

i dont think there is any.
for you're not helping yourself in the first place.

ever heard of cause and effect?
i guess this is what is happening now.

and for your info,
let me share with you something .

X says something untrue/subjective to Y, about A.
Y and A are friends.
Y listens .
and listen.
and listen more.
in the end?
Y changes impression of A.
dont wanna be friends anymore.
or even if friends,
Y also harbours that impression of A inside.

moral of story ;

people's impression of each other changes.
no matter what.
-.-

i dont know.
maybe impression of him have changed.
for the worse, better, i dont know.

you can continue avoiding me.
doesnt matter.
but just let you know.

this is my advice for you.
take it or, leave it.
(:

reVogue ; SUNTEC DANCE FINALS.

my dope hair done by gin . its like some temporary corn row or smth hahahaaa(:

a source of inspiration to me . always wondered how she could achieve so much, and that made me strive even harder to achieve what i always wanted. and thanks to her, my willpower and determination shot up tremendously . ( due to her killer trainings.=x)

OUR JOURNEY. (:

say hello to old hair, girls !

say hello to 'new' us. (:

say hello to different styles! (:




and lastly, the new beginning(:

reVogue
(:

STEFANIE.

the blur one in our group. but she's a strong person. no matter how much scolding she gets, she always perservere to the end. repect yo (:
just remember, 'friends come and go all the time. ' (:

KATHERINE.

she's a funny girl, and she improved so much ever since she stepped in TPDE. she's also very efficient. dope dope(:

SAMANTHA.
lol. this woman here. hahaa. she's a really nice girl to work with. though there were times when you doubt yourself, you still managed to come out of it. and dont forget kay.
we will always be there for you(:

IRIS.
haha. iris tan. lol. this girl here, super blur too.
she's grown so much. i remembered first seeing her in swu, with those flimsy legs and arms.
but now, look at her. with so much sharpness in her actions. haha. remember this.
dont be influenced by others. you make your own decisions , and be the 'patricia' on stage kay! hahaa.=x

BEAUTRICE.

firstly, i think i have to say sorry lol. for being so harsh on you. lol.

you're good. but you need people to push you, to reach your maximum level. i think this is what you have learnt in this competition. hhaa.

(:

MEICHIN.

lol. strong headed woman. guess u've learnt to take life easier now. heh . life's not all about living up to your expectations. learn to see the brighter side of life. and you've improved(:

look back at the older vids of you dancing, and you know what i mean. hahaa.=x

JOYCELYN.

love . (: she's really been a great motivator. and always being so patient. i love that she always help people before herself. and thats what makes her so special.


and to special shout outs.

URBAN STANCE CREW.
thanks so much guys, for helping us in everyway u guys could. if not for you guys, i dont think we can even get our costume out by saturday! (: and for all the encouragements and all. thanks so much .

INDEPENDENT CREW.
you guys rock. i love your wade robson theme, and i feel that you guys always looked out for us, helping in each way you guys could. (:

MY GIRLS.(:
thanks for always being there. to watch me, and to support me. even though we dont meet up as often as we could, u girls are always here for me. love you all (:

ALISON AND SHIJIE
LOL. silent supporters hahaha. thanks for coming to watch us, despite the rain! lets meet up real soon kay! (:

SSG
thanks for supporting! limin for the sms-es and encouragement , and joanna for the msn conversations too. haha. loretta and yn too. love you all(:

and to.

JAMES.
for being the pillar of support , and strength.
and all the wonderful things.
love you (:

moving on.

its the start of my dance journey.
more to come, and i dont want it to stop.
heh .

FLOOR THE LOVE 2008.
(:

suntec's over.

i love reVogue really.

all the trainings and all are over..

but what matters most is that we learn from the process.
heh .

more updates later(:
hahah .

-


happy 7th (:

i love the song .
our love's still going strong.
thank you love.
(:

sorry for the pmsing, and all the sulking .
hahaha.
thanks for being so patient,
so sweet, and caring .
you've been really great.
and im really grateful.
(:


Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you .
(:

i miss you .
):

tomorrow!

7pm.
fountain of wealth .

come on reVogue!

we've been this far, and its our last lap!=D

and to independent crew too .
all the best! (:


we want this badly.
so lets aim for it girls!
(:

in this world,
there's alot of different people .
some people that are your friends,
some that are just mere strangers .

different people have their own principles.
and their own characters.
but the thing about principles that you set are only meant to help you discipline yourself.
nothing else.
and probably its the way you see that sentence that determines how you think bout it.
some feel strongly over it .
some dont
and this is why people have to learn how to compromise, and to give & take.
-

when i wake up from bed today,
i thought alot.
about how things are heading towards,
how things have changed.
and its too drastic a change till im like,
whaaaaat?

im also aware that the society is a cruel one.
people do things in such a way that they will always get what they want.
and many more.
bout friendships,
bout life.
think we should take some time off to reflect bout what have we done,
from the last time we took time off to reflect.
i bet most people cant even remember anymore.
-

i believe in retribution.
and cause and effect.
you cause something to happen,
and as a result, the effect takes place.
so...

dont blame people for what happened.
blame yourself.
and if you're blaming other people other than yourself,
you are just avoiding the real cause of all the saga.
-

i thought you understood that kind of feeling when nothing can be done .
or maybe im wrong.
and guess everything is too premature.
as yet.
-

i thought about what things were like, since march .
and things that happened now.
its so different.
complacent?
or taking things for granted?
or its not a need anymore.
since im always there.
?

-

bottom line of this whole entry is nothing .
its just my unorganised thoughts all thrown here.

goodbye.

just when i thought you understood.

it fucking hurts more when you dont .

hello .
i've been asked to blog .
but i am lazy .
hoooo .
so just droppin by to wish everyone .
or should i say everyGIRL in reVogue good luck !
get more sleep now that you can .
or you will get nasty eyebags like joey .
ahahahahahahhaa .

serene i linked you okay .
don't burst joey's boobs .
LOLLLLLL .